Unfathomable

Thursday, January 09, 2014

Strangest thing.

I was going to meet Bob for lunch. Unlocked Henry, got in. Still wearing gloves, I went to put the keys into the ignition and, when I was only inches away, I was holding nothing. “Well,” I assumed, “I dropped them, and didn’t feel myself dropping them because I have gloves on,” even though that isn’t what it felt like. What it felt like was, the keys had disappeared.

Reached down to the floor in front of the seat. No keys, or anyway I couldn’t feel them. Tried the seat itself, between my legs. Nothing. Took off my gloves and dropped them on the passenger seat, felt around with my bare hands. Nothing. Dropped my hat on top of the gloves, got out of the car and looked: not on the seat, not on the floor in front of the seat. What the–?

Put a knee on the asphalt and poked my head inside the area under the steering wheel. Not there. Looked between the seat and the inside hump (though I had felt there with my fingers after taking off my gloves). Not there. Took up the floor mat. Put the seat all the way back, then all the way forward, looking carefully. No keys. Looked everywhere again, just because I couldn’t think what else to do.

Put the floor mat back, moved the seat back to its position, sat down there and wondered what to do. Without keys I couldn’t go anywhere – and, couldn’t even get back into the house. Finally decided to unlock the passenger door and look in from that side, though of course that didn’t make any sense either, but I was grasping at straws. Unlocked the door, went around, open the door, looked inside. Nothing, of course.

I said, to whoever might be listening, that I didn’t think this was funny and I needed those keys, so give them back. No answer.

I picked up my hat and gloves to put them back on – and there were the keys, under the gloves.

Usually when something like this happens, I try to talk myself into a way that it could have happened in a natural sort of way, I not noticing. This time I couldn’t.

1. A) the keys were just suddenly not there. They didn’t feel the way they do when you drop them.
2. B) when they disappeared, I was within inches of the ignition. I didn’t drop them on the passenger seat, and they didn’t fly off that way.
3. C) they were gone before I took off my gloves, and there was nothing else on the passenger seat when I picked up hat and gloves and found the keys..

Seriously weird.