I had to think about whether to type this up and send it out. It refers to the works of P.D. Ouspensky, who interpreted the system taught by G.I. Gurdjieff. Many decades ago, i was unable to really understand what Ourspensky was talking about. Now it seems i mostly do. But there is always the question of whether in such cases we are fooling ourselves. Here the guys offer a word of reassurance.
Wednesday, July 17, 2019
6 p.m. It is remarkable that I should be able to read The Fourth Way (though only on chapter two), understanding what he is saying, when previously I could not. And I didn’t even need to read all of A New Model of the Universe to see what I knew and what I did not.
7:50 p.m. Of course in one critical respect I am still where I was: What is my situation? Am I helpless, as described? Am I Man #4 due to work before I was born? (For, I always felt different from those around me.) But who, what, am I?
Isn’t it striking that it took so long for you to ask?
I can tell I’m being nudged. For one thing, I wondered if talking with you all these years has been the equivalent of years with a teacher.
Or a therapist.
Or a therapist. I feel like I didn’t begin at Ouspensky’s assumed starting-point, and I wonder if this is error of observation on my part, or change of conditions in 100 years [since he wrote it], or work I’d done previously, or work I’ve done since –
That is, you still don’t know who or what you are.
Are you conscious?
How would I know?
Good answer. Are you sometimes conscious?
I think so.
Do you have continuity of consciousness?
Well, now, that is a good question. If I do, or to the extent that I do, it is because of this habit of talking to you and perhaps of talking to myself.
Ouspensky was wrong. Gurdjieff was wrong, or perhaps we should say was very selective in his exposition. There is more than one way to attain consciousness, only as he said it cannot be done on the 3D level alone, or in fact at all. But with the cooperation of 3D and non-3D, of course the potential for progress exists.
Still a big statement for me, to say that Gurdjieff was either wrong or incomplete.
Do you think he would want you using him as a prop?
I don’t want to fool myself into thinking that I am conscious when I am not. Never did want to. Yet it was difficult, because I can’t ever tell if I am being described.
Intent and access is the key. Access will wake you when you have fallen asleep, if that is truly your intent.
That’s a big statement. I’d love to spread that around, if not for fear that I would be misleading people.
The same old fear – we would have said bugaboo, if you had not been the one holding the pen.
Isn’t it appropriate to be careful?
It is. It is also appropriate to offer what you can offer, and trust people to follow their own judgment.