Sunday, May 15, 2022
5:50 a.m. Guys, the question was posed, have I ever hurt your feelings, or felt I was coming close to doing so? This, in the context of a lager question, do you have feelings? (These questions were posed Wednesday in our ILC group meeting, prior of course to our discussion on Friday of emotion. And on Friday, I am sure you remember, we half-promised each other that we would discuss emotion in the non-3D not generated in 3D. So, setting for maximum focus, receptivity, clarity, and presence. You’re on.
Although you already know the answer, it is worth devoting a few words to why we can’t get our feelings hurt. It should lead to clarifications in related questions.
I imagine it is as simple as this: People get their feelings hurt because of miscommunication, and how is that going to happen when one is connecting essence to essence.
A little slower. That’s correct, but there are instructive nuances. Beyond miscommunication, there is the aspect of intent. That is, yes, people sometimes get feelings hurt because they misunderstand another’s intent. But sometimes one intends to hurt another. Or, one sincerely if tactlessly sees another in an unfavorable light and the other person sees it. This can have to do with appearances correct or misleading, and with reality understood or not.
Bullets?
Yes, probably. It isn’t a complicated subject, but it does have several facets. Discussing them by bullet-points ought to display them and dispose of them without the need for further discussion.
- Misunderstanding intent. A says, “You look nice tonight,” and B hears, “As opposed to how you usually look.” This has to do mostly with one’s self-image.
- Intent to hurt. What used to be called catty remarks. Generally this uses true or mostly true facts, and presents them in the most unfavorable and hurtful way possible. This has more to do with A’s malice than with B’s self-image (as generating cause, we mean).
- Unintended hurt. Sometimes B gets a glimpse of an unpleasant truth by reflection from A’s unguarded reaction. This is not caused by malice on A’s part nor by self-image on B’s part, but by a sudden shaft of light onto a darkened part of the mind. That is, something of which B was unconscious is suddenly moved into one’s awareness, but not by A’s intent.
- A may react to what it sees, and whether what it sees is correct or not, B may feel the pressure of public opinion, so to speak. By “appearance” we are not speaking of clothes, or any particular physical characteristic, but of how B seems as opposed to how B is.
- A may react to something real that is, for whatever reason, somewhat beyond the pale. A slight, received over something real, can hurt worse than one known to be unmerited.
How can any of this affect us in non-3D? If someone misunderstands our intent, do we not know it? How could it affect our self-image? If someone wants to hurt our feelings, will we not see why? Will not our empathy prevent us from taking personally something clearly generated by factors that are clear to us?
And how can we be hurt – unintentionally or intentionally – when we do not live in a condition of division between what we know about ourselves and what we do not know about ourselves? With no unconscious elements, how can unconscious elements be suddenly made conscious?
Well, you know, I never thought you could be hurt, or insulted. I have enjoyed our continuing game of pretending to insult each other, or, let’s say, engaging in little put-ons. But there was never anything negative about such playing, and, as you say, I don’t see how there could be.
So to the related questions: Do we have feelings, and do we have feelings or emotions outside the context of our connection to 3D.
[pause]
And here we come to a halt. Why?
We’re wondering – doubting – if you have stamina enough to open a new subject. Try going back to bed for a while. If when you get up again, you want to leave it at this and transcribe, no harm done. You had thought of taking the day off.
7:40 a.m. Maybe I’ll settle for what we got. I don’t know if it is because I am slowing down in the absence (since Tuesday) of coffee, but for whatever reason, I’m not very peppy today.
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