Session nine of ten

Friday, November 10, 2000

The session

[I began resonant tuning as soon as I was alone in the box, which Skip heard when he got back to the control panel and donned his earphones.]

S: All right, we’ll move right on to focus 10 then. [pause] Take your time, deepen your focus 10 more and more, and when you’re ready. describe your experience of focus 10.

F: They’ve been building the crystal for a couple of minutes now. It’s about halfway up my shins. Either that, or your air conditioner’s on overtime. [pause]

I’m attempting to be inside of the cold, and welcome it and bring it up. [pause]

It’s almost like being inside of a canopy. My first thought is a jet fighter, and my second thought is — like an observatory in a space ship, if there’s such a thing. And a sense of – looking out from a protected space. A sense that that’s what – that’s a definition of us in a body: looking out from a protected space. The body protects us; hold us, sort of. [yawn] [pause]

We’re going somewhere different today, I think. [pause]

S: Describe the perception which makes you say this.

F: A real – the crystal’s about half way up now – a real sense of me in a body being a projection from a longer place, you know, from another – from – a perception that I exist in many more dimensions than this one? And that this one is just sort of here? And I think we’re going to move along that – tube, is the way I’m envisioning it. You know, the tube from us to – The tube from me in the body to – hmm, the words are hard. A minute. A minute

Say that the totality of me is one thing, and the tip of one finger is the me that I know. I think we’re going to move my awareness to other parts of that totality.

S: Very good.

F: What I hear is, this is why, the last session I had to learn – or maybe it was two sessions ago, whenever it was – about getting in – holding on to the perception and not jumping out of it to report? Because it’s going to be even harder this time –no, not harder, it’s going to be more – requires a little practice. [pause]

S: Let’s expand to focus 12 and prepare for this.

F: Uh-huh. We may wind up staying in 12, I think.

S: Very good.

F: Now I think the crystal is complete. There’s still the sense that they gave me once before of the feet being the junction somehow, the connector. It’s the feet that are the coldest, it’s the feet that it starts from, and at one time I had a sense of standing up in the booth – sort of levering up – without moving from – pivoting on my feet. There’s a sense in which that’s meant, and I don’t know yet. [pause] I think the view out the window of the canopy is – because it’s like stars out there – it’s the sense of “a view on the world,” but they wanted not to confuse the world with the earth, you know? It’s like we are a view from physical reality. [pause] We in bodies. [long pause]

I keep thinking of that view from the like river bed in Egypt, of those huge red walls of rock, and just that comforting sense that the earth was larger than anything they could do to it. They were a part, but they weren’t responsible for it, sort of. A kind of comfort that we don’t know. [pause]

What I’d like to do is visit that larger, that greater reality that was, I got to once. I wonder if we can do that? Gentlemen, if you have no pressing objections, let’s do that. [laughs] I’m getting a sense of, “well, whose idea do you think it was, stupid?” [laughs] [pause]

That’s interesting. They have to wait, don’t they? I always underestimate the body. They have to wait for certain conditions to make things possible. Or let’s say they have to juggle and accommodate. You know I had a sudden sense, Skip, of you watching the meters – not of you watching them, but of the meters themselves and of the lines trending in a certain direction, and I suddenly realized, they have to wait to a degree for that too. [pause] It ought to be obvious, I guess, but I don’t think that way. [long pause]

I got a sense that a small part of a crystal – the one thing it can’t do is move; it’s an analogy for us. That’s why our lives are lonely in a certain way, because we can only – see others distantly from inside our own crystal. Our own part of the overall crystal. [long pause]

If you can think of a way for me to phrase it that will be more effective, I’m open to anything they want to show me or have me experience.

S: You talked about them waiting for your body to be correct. Why don’t you observe that taking place? Just observe the body being prepared. No need to report, but just observe those changes.

F: As soon as you say that, boy the cold and the crystal feel of it suddenly really intensifies. [long pause]

Two things. I got a sense that they’re going to give me one thing at a time and I can report it, and the first of those was, a sense of a crystal being squeezed, a pietzo-electric crystal, and that in a way that’s us. [pause]

Well, I was thinking of Jim S____, maybe I should mention that; and Bob, both having these vivid experiences that I’m not having. Huh. It’s almost as though I’m getting an intensification of the cold as a form of approval of what I’ve said. Almost like a feedback system. In other words, “yeah, okay, you got that; now we’ll go on to the next thing.” So it was about Jim and Bob’s experiences, because I came across one of his [Jim’s} on the web today – yes? – sometime. It was connected with my being inside this long, really beautiful, — this milky grayish crystal from the inside and thinking of it as a tube, the way people talk about the tunnel. [pause]

A sense of wondering about the instruments. Your instruments. You know, are they – what are they doing? Oh, it was more a sense of, oh wait a minute, I don’t know. Something’s happening here. [pause] I see. They’re trying to pull my awareness out of my head and deeper into my body. So we’ll do that. [pause]

Hmm. [pause] A sense of going down to the base chakra. Moving awareness there. And it has something to do with a balance, or with balance. That my awareness in my head is too off-centered and it doesn’t give me the leverage I need. [pause] Now – it’s like a calm explosion of warmth in my feet and legs in response to moving that awareness. High energy, but it’s not cold. [pause] Of course I see the message about being more in my body. But it’s not only that.

Wow. [laughs] My legs are burning hot, now. [pause] Like they’re energized. I’ve been talking about myself as the Energizer bunny who’s running out of energizer. It’s like I’m trying to – it’s like my habit is to work from way off center, and it requires more force that way, whereas this brings in the energy naturally. Getting – that wasn’t a mistake, it was a necessary – detour? or a necessary – hmm. It’s the analogy to Cheryl and being a princess. It’s that you have to live that way to know what it’s like not to live that way. Or like coughing as a way of teaching you about breathing. It’s not just for me. [pause]

It’s a real warmth and high energy in my seat and my legs all the way down to my feet, there’s no exception. A tremendous glowing, warm energy pattern. [pause]

Now I can move the energy up, is what I’m hearing. Start from the base and move up, don’t start from the top and move down. That’s not exactly right, because I start from the top to get to the base; I don’t know how else to put it. Nancy’s coming home this weekend from a workshop on chakra-balancing, and she wants to use me as a guinea-pig, and I somehow doubt that’s a coincidence. [pause]

A long time ago in these sessions, we got physical problems that I wasn’t paying enough attention to. One of them in the prostate area. And I now can feel an area that I will assume must be where it must be, even though my mind is saying otherwise. It’s like, if I have my awareness this low, I can be aware of my body –

Oh for heaven’s sakes! In the way that I’m aware of other people’s bodies when I’m working on healing them!

That the reason that I can reach others and not me – it’s just working from up there rather than down here. Okay, the idea being – we can instinctively know our own health and what’s wrong with us and what to do about it by getting down into the base chakra. And as I’m saying that, I get a flash about __ (and it took me till now to remember her name) and that thing on her face. She can get down into the base chakra and when she gets really there, — I’m not sure, but that’s the beginning of – Oh, I see, go into focus 12 from the base chakra, or use focus 12 to get to the base chakra and then expand in focus 12, and the awareness will be there. But it’s not just awareness on a conscious level, it’s body awareness, which means – it’s a way of communicating with the body, with the maintenance of the body. My heavens. It’s like it’s a way of the conscious mind finding out what’s wrong and then re—giving feedback to whatever maintains the body, to say, “okay, we need to work on this. This is happening here.” Wow. If this is true, this is a major tool. In doing distant healing I’ve been aware of other people’s bodies; I could feel where they hurt and I could feel what the problem was, and could never do it for myself. And actually I don’t know of anybody who does it for themselves. If this is true, it’s saying that’s how we have to do it: To get down though and work from the root chakra, and not from the head, or even from the heart which is where I was thinking I would wind up going. I’m going to explore this a little. Experientially.

[long pause.]

[continued next post, 6-23-07]