True then, true now

Tuesday, April 20, 2021

7 a.m. Some things never change, or let’s say, they don’t change unless we change, and even then, they come around again as another turn on the spiral. This from my journal of April 5, 1996 probably applies to a lot of people besides me:

[April 5, 1996

[Gentlemen, any words to the wise for this depressed gentleman?

[The words are that you are as you are, and that’s what you wanted to become. As Neale {Donald Walsch, the author of the Conversations with God books} would say – or as God had Neale say, choose one – or don’t choose at all, to be more accurate. Your choice every moment is, “What do I want to be this minute?” Which is always under your control to the extent that you remain conscious. Externals act as prods, only and always. If you read Lanny Budd or watch “Casablanca” or sit watching trees vibrate to the wind and the moment, you are still on the so-called inside reacting to things on the so-called outside.

[Is there something particular I can do right now to improve things?

[You can right now – always right now, and only right now – determine to exist right now as a fully conscious being, aware of inside and outside influences, not identifying. Observing the tides. All the angst about who you are, where you are going, what’s going to happen – etc. – is useless as you know. Self-indulgent. Contradictory. So – forget all that horseshit, as the book {Alexander’s Feast} you love so well says.]

Verb sap., but easy to forget.

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