Friday, May 3, 2019
3:30 a.m. Gentlemen? [blank pause] I suppose it is up to me to provide a focus, but I don’t have one. Well, let’s look at the novel. I’m sorry to have missed yesterday, but mostly because I’m not confident I’ll keep going if I miss day by day. Talk to me about making it deeper.
Remember that you can always return and return to the same material to add layers of profundity. Only don’t calcify.
Meaning, I take it, keep it loose enough that there is room for the added layers.
Well – loose enough that the plot does not overwhelm, or strangle, the real story.
I am aware of the disparity between what I would like to accomplish and my skill I can bring to the task.
Only apply yourself longer, deeper.
I think I understand that, but maybe expound a little?
You need to spend more time working. It doesn’t have to be more time writing, though it may be that this will happen as a result, but more time thinking about it, making notes, plotting, as you (we) did for Babe. This will help you.
Live it more.
That’s one way to put it, yes. As you live within it, it will take on your concerns, as foods cooked and stored blend over time.
I see. Time spent reading or watching Netflix may actually shallow it out.
It is a process of dilution. In this case, if you were working on a non-fiction as the same time as the fiction, they could be made to reinforce each other. You would be doing different things, but they would both keep you in the same mental/emotional space.
So, the introduction to Only Somewhat Real [the first Nathaniel book]. I’d actually forgotten about it. had to look around to find the typescript. It lacks an epilog that tells what it is about – mainly because I can’t say what it is about.
So, live with it, don’t live only in proximity to it. That is, immerse yourself in it not only when you talk to us, but continuously.
I get the sense that – well, you say it.
Your novel can be, inter alia, about Eddie’s focusing, developing a new focus of being to match his already developed focus of purpose.
So that he starts to see what George was getting at [in Dark Fire].
First focus your being, then what you do will contribute toward wholeness rather than postpone it or work against it.
And I am out of time to begin doing that.
No, you’ve been doing it for many a year – but you are running out of time to express the fruit of your yearning and your learning.
I’m not yet in focus.
Egypt was two weeks of attempting to hold a focus – not a focus level, such as Monroe would teach, but a focused (crystallized) being. Now live that.
It has been two months already since I returned. I haven’t been very awake all that time.
Look forward now, and back, not one or the other to the exclusion of the other.
I feel, so strongly, the absence in my life of an editor for my books and a spiritual director, call it, for my living.
Then you will have to continue to be your own editor, your own spiritual director, as an example for all those others who struggle along in the absence of these things. Or – but it could be an “and” – you could call such things to you.
My temptation is to go upstairs and put this on the computer, to send it out.
That isn’t a bad thing to do, only don’t let it persuade you that you’ve done your day’s work, now it is up to you to kill time until you can receive another message.
Yes, I do see that. Enough for now?
It can be. But what you do today is always up to you. It can reinforce your basic purpose, or cut against it. That is always true, for everyone, regardless of specific circumstances.