Monday, October 23, 2017
2:15 a.m. Just for a moment, it came clear. Can I hold it long enough to express it? We are real as characters, but not as what we think we are. We are, as was said yesterday, a half-step less real than the next level of reality. And I suspect that that half-step away from reality is another of those “as above, so below” progressions.
I have been reading a life of Ernie Pyle, and specifically have been reading about Hollywood trying to get a handle on him, in making “The Story of G.I. Joe” in 1944. They took the facts and tried to turn it into myth, which is, after all, what story-telling does. And as always I have been reading a steady diet of light fiction, only with new eyes now. And suddenly, as I say, just as I was getting back to bed, for a second everything crystallized, and I understood, or I suppose I should say I saw, only sort of understanding. And the process of putting something seen, or felt, or intuited, into words – well, it’s easy to lose the nub of it, or in fact to never quite grasp it.
We – our essence – are one thing. We – the characters we create and play in this improv performance – are not the same thing, not quite as real, not quite us, just as we appear while we are doing the improv.
It may sound like playing with words. It isn’t. But it’s slippery to hold on to. I’ll check it with Nathaniel and company, but maybe not just now.
5:50 a.m. Nathaniel?
That’s the sense of it. It is one way to see who and what you are. It is not analogy or metaphor or fairy tale or “let’s think of it this way.” It is accurate, factual, plain. Only, it isn’t the only way to see yourselves.
But as a corrective to other views –
Yes, excellent corrective. It’s hard to put this clearly enough to be sure you have both halves: It isn’t the only way to see yourselves; it is one, valid, illuminating way.
But you are too tired to have a good session, plus you haven’t been taking time off. Type this up, send it off, and be on your way for a while. If you ring us too soon, maybe we won’t answer the phone.
“Your call is very important to us –“
But not important enough to pick up the phone. Right.
Okay, well, maybe later today, maybe not. Thanks – and thanks to whoever it was sent me that clarifying thought in the night.
Nice try, but you won’t be tempting us into conversation at the moment. Go away for now.