What do you want to be?
by John Dorsey Wolf
From Me and My Joint Mind:
Last night in my sleep I had a interesting counseling session. “You are always getting ready for what comes next.” What was meant was that whatever it is that I am involved with at the pre-sent is preparing me for what I will be involved with subsequently. This applies in the current life as well as what follows.
In the context of the current life it is consistent with what Rita has taught us: that our experienc-es lead us to choices of the next experience; or, another way to look at it, our current choice re-stricts the options on subsequent choices of what we experience. Why would not the same apply to our post life-in-the-body experiences? “You are creating your future now.”
The question came through, “What do you want to be?” I thought and said (non-verbally), “You mean, what do I want to do?” The answer was, “No, what do you want to be?” Here, there is more “being” than “doing”.
As I woke up there were two thoughts in my head. The first was, this is a topic of enough im-portance that I had a remembered conversation about it in my sleep (which happens rarely with me), encouraging me to pursue it. Secondly, it set me to thinking how what I am experiencing now is affecting what I am to be.
It is straightforward for me to retrace certain aspects of my life and see how one event led to an-other. It is also perceivable how previous events prepared me for subsequent ones. But this is different. How do the events of our life mold who we become?
The temptation to describe ourselves in terms of our “doings” is very high. I am a retired engi-neer from the aerospace business. That is true, but that’s not who I am.
In a previous connection a few months ago when we were cleaning out a storage room, I was told, “This is how you think of your life, as a series of boxes, each containing the memories of your experiences at specific times and places. But your experiences are not you.”
“When you stop and dwell on the contents of a “box”, feelings do come back. Memories of those experiences return. They may not be accurate, but they are the way you now remember it. We put the story of ourselves together by lining up the boxes. Even as you bring back memories, or rearrange them, you are reinforcing the (mostly) fictional story you tell yourself about your life (said with humor).
But even you are missing the real you when you do that. All you can get from a box is what your end of the “stick” experienced at the time. What you don’t recall, and can’t, is what the rest of the “stick” got out of all those boxes, and of course what’s in between them as well. Those boxes don’t tell much of the ripple effects that your experience had on others either.” (The “stick” here is referring to the continuum of consciousness between the me in the physical, externally oriented at one end, and the rest of my greater being reaching into everything at the other.)
How can we answer the question of who we are becoming, without understanding who we are presently and how we became who we are?
I am a mind, knitted from a selected community of minds, each of whom are knitted from their own selected community. I am a perception; a unique one. A simple example: each one of us could look at a picture of pools and waterfalls in a steep canyon. Some might sense peace and tranquility; but, I am going to also see great danger, because I fell in such a canyon. I am a per-ception molded by experience.
I have an iconoclastic nature, and my experiences encouraged and emphasized that aspect of me, so I am primed to “be” that. If I had a choice to participate in an established process or organiza-tion versus trying to make change to it, I would pick the change route every time.
While these examples are just that, it is my belief they come closer to describing me as a mind and a perspective, than does any of my “doings”. I am a product of my life events but I am not those events.
Back to the question: What do you want to be?” When you are mind without body, what do you want to be? I think that’s worth thinking about.