Rita — going through judgment

Monday, February 22, 2016

F: 4:10 a.m. So, things are getting very interesting, Rita. Something of a desert, the hours between talking to you and being able to do it again. Pray continue.

R: Yes, and of course it is a pleasure to have an interested and appreciative audience. Communication is flow, and flow is life.

To proceed. You die to the 3D world and your world is now your own mental world, your subjectivity, in a way you did not experience previously, perhaps, except in dreams. Your previous communication with the parts of yourself you were not conscious of may have taken place entirely without your conscious knowledge; or you may have had anomalous experiences; or perhaps you casually or occasionally or routinely or systematically made it a practice to broaden that communication. You can see that in each of these cases, your reaction to the experiences that follow cessation of sensory contact with the 3D is going to be different. What is familiar will evoke different reactions than what is not.

But in any case, your first experience is going to be a confrontation with yourself as you were rather than yourself as you conceptualized yourself. Your idea of who you were is going to meet the reality of who you were.

Now, by that I don’t mean, you were a fraud. And I don’t mean, quite, that you weren’t who you thought you were (although that is true as well). I mean, more, that nobody gets to look at themselves as they are, but only as they look in a mirror, so to speak – and mirrors reflect us to ourselves only to a limited degree – backwards, for one thing, and usually only from one vantage point. We see a small amount, and infer more, and confuse a lot of what we really are with what we wish we were and what we imagine we are.

F: It is said, we judge others by their actions and ourselves by our intentions.

R: Largely true, and hard to avoid, because in each case we judge by what is easiest to observe. But now, conditions are different, and in effect everything changes. You know how NDE accounts often stress that one’s past-life review demonstrates all one’s actions not only again from one’s own viewpoint but also from the viewpoint of everyone else involved. Well, that is cramming a non-3D, non-sequential experience into 3D sequential terms.

F: I can see that. It isn’t that you are watching a movie, but that you suddenly see wider and deeper.

R: Yes except “suddenly” is a time-oriented term that may mislead. I am describing the change as part of a natural process, a sort of flowering, a blossoming-out as the soul decompresses from its long 3D experience.

F: I thought yesterday, this almost sounds like describing a 3D life as the birth canal, and death as the entering forth into independent life after the long period of safe gestation. That isn’t how life usually feels! And yet, I can see it that way, the way you are describing things. We are conceived of strands brought together for the purpose, we spend a certain amount of time growing the organism and learning which wires move which control surfaces, getting ready to function in the real world, and then we’re born – we die to 3D-only experience. Yes?

R: It is an analogy. Play with it and see if it is useful. But I don’t want to get diverted at the moment.

You see your life, now [that is, at the stage she is describing], from all sides at one, so to speak. To a greater or lesser degree, you pass through a phase of judgment of yourself. The more judgmental you are, the more painful the process, for nobody is perfect. Nobody lives up to his or her standards. Nobody is “without sin,” so to speak.

However – this is only a phase. It is not imposed from without and it isn’t exactly necessary as part of the process. It is, shall we say, a likely part of the process, the result of a bad habit, you might say.

F: “Judge not, lest you be judged.”

R: Or perhaps, judge not lest your habit of judging others is going to turn itself on itself when all “external” life is gone.

But judging yourself is only a habit! It is only a stage you go through. If you don’t go through it at all (as little children wouldn’t, perhaps) your process is smoother and less painful. If you cannot get out of it, you get stuck, and here you see souls experiencing themselves in hell.

F: Or in purgatory, I suppose – the place souls are said to reside while they burn clean.

R: Well, that’s it, you see – and again, I should have listened psychologically when you brought out memories of your Catholic theology. Purgatory makes no sense as a destination, just as judgment by God makes no sense. But purgatory as a description of the result of a psychological process is another story.

Judgment contains the assumption that there was a standard against which one could be (and would be) measured. As long as you see your remembered life in the context of judgment, just that long are you going to be enmeshed in regret and humiliation and pain and a vain wish that you had been other than you were. And this condition is particularly painful because you can’t get a grasp on it so as to steer it (as you did when in 3D) to less painful thoughts, or more self-approving channels. You are, in effect, caught in a nightmare from which there is no exit.

F: Yikes.

R: “Yikes” indeed.

F: I can almost feel we should stop here, that is so dramatic a place.

R: However, this is not “The Perils of Pauline,” so we will continue. [“The Perils of Pauline was the first “cliff-hanger series.] This stage of judgment – of self-judgment, let me emphasize – lasts as long as it lasts. There are several variables that determine how long. One is the degree to which the conscious mind has been accustomed to blocking out data and impulses and – in a word – guidance from its non-3D self, like a headstrong teenager. Obviously, the easier the non-3D can smooth the way by suggesting there is another way to see things, the better. Another is, as I say, the extent to which the 3D has been in the habit of judging rather than accepting. In a way, that habit is the same habit as refusing input from guidance; it is an insisting on its own 3D-limited viewpoint as absolute. A third variable may be considered (by the soul undergoing the process) external, and we won’t go into that quite yet.

In any case, the soul, upon losing access to the 3D world, confronts itself not only (not even primarily) as it has been, but as it is.

You see? In 3D you naturally assume that the departed soul sees its life primarily or entirely in the context of the 3D life it just departed, or emerged from, rather. But is that how you live your life day to day while still in 3D? Do you wake up each morning comparing yourself to what you were in fifth grade? Or do you address yourself to the questions confronting you in your present moment? This is often lost sight of, it seems to me, in discussing the soul’s emergence. It may be bewildered and its only immediate frame of reference may be oriented toward the 3D life that is all it remembers (at first), but the past is not its concern. What it needs to know is, “Where do I go from here? What do I do? Who and what am I?”

It is the same group of questions that surround you in 3D, you see, only the conditions are different.

Now, we are rapidly running out the clock, so let me just finish with this stage of emergence.

While you are in judgment, progress stops. You go over and over it, unable to correct past errors, unable to retroactively make better choices, unable to – in short – make amends to others or (in a sense) to yourself. “I could have done so much better” is the theme song of this stage. But it doesn’t last forever. It changes, the moment – whether the moment come slowly or all at once – that you realize that what has been done has been done, and you are what you have made yourself, and now what?

F: That is acceptance, isn’t it? “And now what?”

R: Once you decide to get on with it, you are through with the vain regrets. Regret and judgment is a form of grabbing the sides of the sliding board, you know. Once you let go of having to be right (for that is what the habit of judgment is all about), progress resumes and you’re moving again. Everything changes, as we shall see.

F: This is fun, Rita. Many thanks, and how long until tomorrow morning?

11 thoughts on “Rita — going through judgment

  1. How long, indeed…? Exciting and lots of parallel stuff. Still trying to adjust my perception concerning the glitches of my being. Dropping stuff, what bothers me is that it is not rhyming with the rest of what is going on. A glitch in the field, so to say. My tendency to judge myslef (clumsy me..why did you do that..?) makes it difficult to see past the frustration of the moment. Is it some different version of me knocking on the door of my consciousness? And I just get angry about the noise…I bet the one knocking is going nuts, too. Funny. Reminds me about the many funny incidents in inter-species communication. Animals seem to have endless patience in waiting for the human to figure out what they’re saying.

    It is as if there is something – is the non-3D coming closer? Guidance is coming closer, the feel of allD is starting to emerge…does this mean the bourne is starting to crumble? As if the (perceived/assumed) wall is turning permeable?

    The allD perspective just feels such a relief. I have this ambition to understand, and the perspective change just takes off so much pressure. I’m not supposed to get it with my head, after all. Build the understanding from where I stand, from the tools I have here, now. An explorer in the mysterious ways of being. Makes for more fun and less worry on the journey. Thank you F&R!

  2. Oh, seems I can’t stop…animals (talking ’bout my horse, actually) have no scruples about showing you when you miss the point about yourself or what they want you to know. A horse can in some mysterious way rub my face on exactly the aspects of myself I’d rather not want to know. Healthy. My belly is often quite full of humble pie, though. Fessin’ up to ones’ real face…seems like an important task here, in this life. And another aspect, to keep alive a connection to joy. These two: real me, joy.

  3. Huh. I was just explaining to someone the other day that what I seem to have gotten out of this illness is acceptance. Of my lack of perfection, that I can’t change many things about self and others and so can relax and just accept. Sounds like my entrance to the afterlife has been made easier, due to a lessening of self judgment. Fascinating.

  4. A wonderful session, so clear and to the point. I loved the flowering analogy, too. This is incredibly helpful. Thank you.

  5. The conversation continues to be very interesting…I can see now the value in a “practice of self-contemplation”, which, hopefully, will get me thru the harmful tendency I’ve had much of this life of “self-contempt”. I, too, am looking for the “joy of life in 3D”, yet have felt stymied by my own self-judging/lack of self-love/respect.

    I do feel this is a “worthy” time for me to really “study myself”, yet I do not want to lose my sense of spontaneity, irreverent sense of humor, and fun (I think my quirky sense of humor is part of the “unique soul” I’m forging this lifetime). I’d like to set time aside daily for such a practice. “Warts and all…”

    Rita’s description of the “nightmare from which there is no exit” sounds, on surface, quite terrifying to me. It’s nice that she offers hints of “remedies” for at least some of this “bardo state” which I can apply, while still in 3D, a big one, of course, being letting go of the self-judging/condemnation. Also, recognizing my own “uplink” to Source Self (i.e. TGU/Joint Mind…), and, as Seth has suggested, paying attention to those impulses/intuitions, while exercising intellect/logic as to which I would choose to follow (or at least acknowledge).

    Her summation of the NDE represents another “meaningful coincidence” for me,for just earlier today, I was thinking about all this “death-stuff”, and was considering the possible differences to an NDE “survivor’s” account of the “life review”, and what Rita is saying what actually occurs, once we “turn away from” 3D. To me, it seems the NDEer (as many have described, from reading PMH Atwater’s research, et al) has a different sort of life review, for they, at some level (Source Self?) know they are coming back, and do get the chance in 3D to “choose otherwise”. Once “death is permanent”, the value of “acceptance” seems all that more clear to me now.

    Frank and Rita, keep up the good work! This sort of thing is much-needed (for me, certainly) in these “rather crazy” (oops!
    “Judgement”!) times…


  6. Dear Rita,

    Would you be willing to share your experience of :”But in any case, your first experience is going to be a confrontation with yourself as you were rather than yourself as you conceptualized yourself. Your idea of who you were is going to meet the reality of who you were.”

    Thanks again. Louisa

    1. I don’t know about Rita, but I can’t see the usefulness of putting up an example — consult your own guidance and ask for whatever you need to know. Still, maybe Rita will volunteer something. We’ll see.

  7. Just keeps getting more interesting…Set myself up to dream something different, but what I got was a recurring dream: there is a neighbour in the other end of the house/terraced house/nearby. And this neighbour has never been seen. Only the tracks of car, a closing door, a creak of floorboards – these tell there is something. And this neighbour, never seen, strikes complete terror in me. I don’t want to see them, don’t want to know they exist. Just knowing they are there means dis-ease for me. And last night, even my mother joined me in plotting how to prevent “them” from moving nearer.

    From the perspective of here&now it seems like this: there is a sort of physical terror that strikes me in the moments when the spirit insinuates its presence. Some part of me says whatever is there is something like anti-me. Because that is what it is. Truly&fully surrendering means I admit it is not me that holds all this together – including my perception of me. And at the level of words I know this, but there is some part that hides well, but when the neigbour knocks on the door…my fear gets too big. I lose ability to function. I’ve imagined countless ways and reasons to step towards the neighbours, but in the dreams I keep avoiding and fearing them. Last night, though, the terror was not quite as big as earlier.

    There’s so many things falling into place with this perspective – just amazing. Much gratitude.

    1. Decades ago I was haunted by a dream in which i was being pursued and threatened by this huge monster behind me. When i finally got up the courage to confront him — when i turned around — he shrank to the size of a small boy, and i realize that my terror was never implicit in the situation but only in my idea of the situation.

      1. Yes, the first recollection of the terror for me is from teenage years. In the dream my “wake” consciousness turned up, and I was strolling through a park in autumn. And I realized in my consciousness that when I turn around, there can be anything. And I got so scared I woke up. The unknown is pretty much the only scare for me. Monsters don’t really do it for me. The issue is just overblown fear that has nothing as its basis so it is rather difficult to find ways to train myself to it. But it is so interesting how dreams point out the issues at hand, quite independent of what I think they are.

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